parenting – Views from VanDeWalle

With the school year starting, the busyness of after-school activities and homework assignments will be here soon. As families are pulled in different directions for school, work, and practices, time as a family comes at a premium. Making efforts to build the focus of your children could decrease time spent on homework to free up more time for family activities. Creating a permanent, designated study space is one way to build your youth’s focus. Here are a few items to keep in mind when creating the study space:

Make It Work for You – Every child is different and has different needs. Some prefer a quiet corner in their room while others may prefer to be close to a parent for help at the kitchen table. Just make sure that the traffic and noise of other family members do not become a distraction.

Manage the Senses – Lighting and noise issues are very common distractions. Tired eyes have more difficulty transferring knowledge into memory. To keep sharp, make sure to provide adequate overhead lighting to limit squinting. Also, check that electronic devices like laptops and tablets are set at a comfortable level.

Make It Comfortable – Temperature and seating can make a difference in a youth’s ability to concentrate. Make sure that the study space keeps the child relaxed, but alert. It is also important that he or she has adequate space to spread out books, papers and materials to make the space efficient. While a bed may make a great space for spreading out, it may prove too relaxing. Consider a cushioned chair with generous table space. Also, it is important that the chair fit the youth. Dangling legs and hunched shoulders can create distractions as well.

Keep It Organized – Another way to increase the efficiency of the space is to keep all supplies and materials readily available and easy to find. Any time spent looking for the lost blue marker is time spent away from the task and an opportunity for further distraction. Organized space provides a launching pad for organized study. Keep clutter at a minimum using cubbies, canisters and boxes. A calendar, planner or to-do list can also keep homework assignments and activities prioritized and on track for on-time completion.

Limit Distractions – While the computer and television can be excellent sources of educational content, they also provide limitless distraction. If the child believes they can focus better with a little background noise, try some recorded music and save the favorite show as a reward when they can spare his or her attention.

Make It Your Own – If the child is expected to spend considerable time in the study space, let him or her decorate the space with posters, pictures or artwork. These items could provide creative inspiration for the child’s next essay or art project.

This article comes from a series of resources developed by Nebraska Extension, 4-H Youth Development Professionals. Learn more about 4-H at 4h.unl.edu, follow us on Facebook at https://www.facebook.com/Nebraska4H/ or on Twitter at https://twitter.com/nebraska4h. For more information, contact the author – Jennifer Schoen (jschoen4@unl.edu), Extension Educator.

Photo by Miguel u00c1. Padriu00f1u00e1n on Pexels.com

With the school year complete, hopefully, an opportunity to spend more time with your child exists. Reconnect and reflect on the school year and plan for the summer. Sarah Roberts and Jackie Steffen, Learning Child Extension Educators provided great tips on how to inspire conversations with your child by asking powerful questions which I’ve included in this week’s column.

Questions are powerful tools, and they encourage children to think at a higher level. The types of questions you ask young children can affect the quality of your conversation with them. Some questions only elicit rote answers and, therefore, will not spark a meaningful conversation or connection. Others encourage thought-provoking conversations and ideas. Having intentional and meaningful conversations with young children is critical to providing an atmosphere of emotional security. Engaging with and listening to children helps them to feel valued and respected. They learn to feel safe talking with you and sharing thoughts and feelings that may be otherwise difficult to discuss.

Here Are Some Ways to Inspire Rich Conversations:

Try to ask more open-ended questions. Open-ended questions are questions that cannot be answered with one word. Instead of asking, “How was your day?” consider rephrasing and saying, “Tell me about the favorite parts of your day.”
Distractions are all around us. Take time to fully engage with young children and practice active listening in a one-on-one environment. That means removing electronics and getting down on their level. Giving children your full attention demonstrates that you respect them and what they have to say.
Make conversations a habit. The time of day that works best is different for everyone. Some might be able to connect deeply on the “to and from” activity/school commutes, others at bedtime or maybe around the table. Take notice of when your child feels the most comfortable opening up to you.
Do your homework. If your child is in school and you have access to daily announcements, lesson plans or newsletters, use that information to help spark conversations. Children can fail to mention exciting events unintentionally. They may be surprised with some pieces of information that you know about their day.
Finally, remember that conversations are a two-way street. If you ask too many questions, children can feel like they are being drilled. Do not just ask questions; open up and talk about YOUR day. Being authentic and modeling good communication with other adults in their school or home will encourage children to join in on conversations. Asking higher-level questions takes practice and time. Think about what information you want to share with your child and what you would like to know from them. Be genuine. If it is tough to talk to them, don’t worry. It is important to start practicing conversation skills, especially when children are young. Have fun and keep a sense of humor and wonder. Children will follow your lead.

Here are a Few Open-Ended Questions to Get You Started:
If you were the family chef, what would you make today for breakfast (lunch, dinner)? Why?
If you could do anything today, what would it be?
What was your favorite part about the holidays this year?
This year has been hard for lots of people. Is there anything positive you experienced? What things do you wish you could change?
If you could ask me anything (teachers or parents), what would it be?

References: “Big Questions for Young Minds: Extending Children’s Thinking” by Janis Strasser and Lisa Mufson Bresson

Tag: parenting

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Inspiring Rich Conversations Through Questions